Prayer Team

Last June, I was able to go on a missions trip to Northern Ireland.I am so grateful for the many things that God showed me, reminded me and taught me during the trip.

Toward the end of our time there, the church we had been working with during Street Reach, held a community barbecue and we were able to help out!

As they were announcing roles for the event- I, along with several other people, chose to be on the prayer team.
They had us split up into two groups and told us that we would rotate between two stations- inside of the church & outside of the church.

Inside- We made constant requests for His will to be done. It was a beautiful thing to be able to continuously lift up and hand over the entire event to God. It was quiet there. Those moments were so special and humbling.

After some time passed at our stations, we would switch. I loved being able to pray for every volunteer/ attendee and I also loved being able to rotate outside to interact with people.

Outside- As we walked out, we were instantly greeted by the bright day and blaring music. There were games, cooking, talking and laughter.

Despite all that was going on, everything slowed..down… Normally I’d be somewhat distracted but that time praying to the Creator, allowed me to see just how immensely valuable each moment is to Him. I become more aware of the eternal work that God was doing. I was able to look around at the people and be so deeply grateful that He allowed me to be there.

We had so many special moments with kiddos that we talked to and prayed with- moments that I will always hold close to my heart!! The conversations were wonderful. There were jokes, giggles and heartfelt prayers as well.

The most special moment happened when someone on our prayer team had a conversation with two elementary aged girls.They had never been to that church and they decided that they wanted accept Jesus as their Savior!!!

They were given Bibles & we were able to pray with them inside the church- in the room where our rotations previously allowed us to pray for the very thing that God was now allowing us to witness. ❤

The girls were BEYOND excited! It was the greatest blessing to see God work in their hearts, in that very moment!!

The next day we attended the church service and the girls walked in with their bibles- BEAMING with the same amount of joy that they had the day before. (The joy that they had reminded me of the true, deep joy that comes from experiencing Jesus’ grace, forgiveness and love- joy that I never want to take for granted!)

God answered our team’s prayers– in such a deep and meaningful way. I saw His IMMENSE love for those girls as they prayed to accept Jesus into their hearts! ❤️

Inside
Outside

-When insecurity knocks-


What makes us let insecurity in?

Is it the experiences we wish we could change? The hurtful things people say to us when they themselves are hurting? The things society tells us we should be?

All of the above?

When you’re young, you’re experiencing so many things for the first time. You’re not afraid.

But as you get older, there tends to be a pattern of hurt that just continually repeats itself. The monotony of that pain,is tiring. You just want rest.

You’re not sure who you are, where to go or if you’re even doing things right.

You sit down and step into your mind. All of the sudden,You hear loud knocking and yelling too, about how you should’ve done better today and how you’re not good enough. That is insecurity.

You can’t think straight, your head hurts and you’re concentrating on trying to ignore it. You just want peace.

Instead of fighting it, you decide to let the insecurity in and you feel grateful. You sigh, sit down and relax.

You think, by allowing it to come in, that you will get some peace and rest. That you’re just calmly surrendering and that you both get to equally share your thoughts.

But letting it in, doesn’t mean that you both sit down, laugh and have a cup of tea together.

What you don’t realize is that it’s a dictator, It doesn’t want to equally share your thoughts, it wants to fully control your every thought and feeling. It doesn’t have an ounce of kindness in it.

It speaks louder than any of your kind thoughts ever had before.

You aren’t kind enough or good enough.

Why do you even speak, when your words don’t mean a thing? Why do you laugh when you don’t deserve to? Why do you even exist at all?

It continues on, telling you who is greater than you. Listing off every name you know and each stranger you pass.

The tears stain your pillow with brokenness and heartache.

You dug a hole so deep within your thoughts and you didnt even think to bring a ladder with you.

What you didn’t realize, was that while you were digging the hole, insecurity let depression in.

While insecurity was continually telling you all that you weren’t, depression was in the background, laughing.

Depression takes over every happy feeling, until you yourself cant find any joy.

You feel lost, weary and you wish you could just give up.

But by grace, you eventually, climb up. The air becomes clearer. You can breathe, think and see better.

Finally, both of them get thrown out.

Slowly, you begin to feel happiness again, and you realized how much you missed it.

You’ll still have the scars and, sometimes, you’ll reflect on what it told you.

Insecurity will most likely want to come inside and take over again.

It’ll yell cruel things at you too, from time to time. It’s voice is so recognizable in its familiarity that, sometimes, you can’t help but listen to the harsh words.

Do me a favor, if insecurity ever knocks, please dont answer.


So back story..

A couple years after that season happened, I reflected back on everything that happened and decided to write about it.

My worth was coming from the people around me. Over a course of a few years, a lot of people I was close to, moved away. My sense of worth went with them.

Having no sense of worth made me seriously doubt God’s love for me. And that physically hurt.. I could see how He loved everyone else in the world, but not me.

All I could pray, over and over again was- ‘Jesus..please.. help.. Jesus..please..help.’

He taught me AND showed me through conversations, situations, prayer, and His word how much He loves me. That’s why, by grace, I climbed out of the hole.It felt like such a hard, longgg process to go through but His ways are the best. The length of time allowed me to learn to continuously surrender and it helped me learn how to better trulyyy rely on Him. I also learned that God’s work is evident if you are wholeheartedly seeking Him.❤

In reality, the insecurities stemmed from putting my life in the world’s hands, not my Savior’s. What I realized through all of that was that my worth comes from how much Jesus loves me.

Change is inevitable. It can hurt.. but when God is your rock and refuge, when He is the center of your life, He allows you to see things the way that He sees them.The most amazing thing in life, is the fact that God NEVER changes.. He is steadfast, loving, faithful and everlasting.

So if you’re ever doubting your worth because of things this world may tell you, please know and remember where your purpose REALLY comes from. Go to Him in prayer and combat the lies, with the truths from His Word.

God wants to have the center.. He cares about you more than anyone everrr could and He who knows you better than you know yourself. He is the ONLY one who cares about you enough to deserve the center spot. PLEASE let HIM have it.❤

-My favorite prayer-

I’ve learned some awesome things about prayer over past years.. I have also discovered my favorite thing to pray for.(:

Before, I would thank God for all he has done for me and I would ask Him for extremely specific things. What I now realize, is that by being extremely specific, I was putting God in a box.
A few years ago, I had decided I fully wanted everything God wanted for me.
So I prayed…


I prayed for opportunities, friendships, and experiences that would bring me closer to Him. I truly wanted it. I also prayed that He would take the things out, that drew me away from Him.


I thought of my life as a garden. God was the gardener. He could nurture the things that were good, dig things out , and plant new things.

What ultimately happened after, was the most amazing thing ever. I started realizing that my life had so many weeds and those weeds were not allowing other wonderful things to grow.

By completely allowing Him to work, He did just what I had asked.
New friendships developed, and preexisting ones flourished. The best thing about them were that they were friendships that encouraged me to deepen my faith and that always directed me back to God when I needed it.

Situations came up, that ultimately helped me even better understand how much our Savior loves us.
When I allowed it, everything started bringing me to closer to Him.

When I prayed, I could feel God telling me to do things, that were out of my comfort zone, and doing those things were life altering because I became even closer to my creator through them.

It wasn’t just about what I thought I wanted anymore, it was what He wanted for me.

I (lil’ ol’ me) was trying to work (alone) on changing things in my life so I could be closer to God, but I hadn’t even thought to ask HIM to help me become closer. That feels silly to me now, because God desires a close relationship with us, even more than we do and He knows what to do to make it happen(:

More often than I’d like to admit, I put Him back in that box and decide take my life over again.. that’s when my life starts feeling chaotic.

Then I remember to pray ❤

-Why I love keeping a prayer Journal-

I started keeping a prayer journal about three years ago.

It is an awesome thing to be able to read and see what God has been doing in my life over a long period of time.

I’ve found that writing/reading through my prayer journal, REALLY helps me surrender my wants and desires to God.

What you do

It’s simple. You write down any prayers that you have. Pretty self-explanatory right?

You could start your journal by writing some of my favorite bible verses. I LOVE having mine at the beginning of my journal.

Then you could start writing out your prayers! You could write a letter thanking Him for always being there, asking for a job, praying for more faith, asking for guidance, praying for a greater desire to read His Word, praying for a friend, ect. Anything you want to bring to Him!

Through the prayer journal, I have learned that God always answers requests with a ‘Yes’, ‘No’, or a ‘Wait’ & that each one of those answers contain equal amounts of sovereignty and love.

He is so so good.

My prayer journal is a physical record of God’s faithfulness and love in my life.

If you haven’t tried keeping a prayer journal, you should definitely give it a chance, you may just love it!